Editing the World

Comeback

2012-01-21T07:30:00.002-05:00

What a good reply to such a comment...

Flying Fish

2012-01-20T08:29:00.005-05:00

When I came downstairs, I asked if I'd missed anything.

"Yes!" my three children answered.

They proceeded to demonstrate their skill at throwing goldfish crackers into the air and then catching them in their mouths. Again and again and again. Fortunately, we buy goldfish in bulk.

The kids miss plenty and the dogs stand at the ready to clean up the casualties. And the kids miss so much that the dogs don't even scramble for the scraps, they politely take what comes.

I bet the dogs wish we ate all our food this crazy way.

A Chainless Mind

2011-12-23T12:06:00.004-05:00

I have only read (and enjoyed) Christopher Hitchens in Vanity Fair, but I want to read more after hearing Scott Simon's story on Hitchens' death on NPR:

It may be telling that Christopher Hitchens should die in this season. I don't mean the holiday season but a contentious season in Congress and on the campaign trail, with politicians jabbing fingers and accusing each other of inconsistency.

Writers and thinkers are fixed with labels these days so that people can order up opinions like flavors in an ice cream shop: chocolate or strawberry, liberal or conservative. A lot of people seem to turn to news for a bolstering jolt of reassurance that they're right: news and views to strengthen convictions that they're already sure they hold.

But you couldn't fix a label on Christopher Hitchens; that's why he was worth reading and hearing.

He called himself a Trotskyite-Marxist in the 1970s, though he seemed much funnier to me than whatever I ever imagined a Trotskyite-Marxist to be. A number of years ago, after his falling out with The Nation magazine, people stopped referring to him as liberal. A little after that, as he became outspoken about his atheism, they stopped referring to him as a conservative. By the time he died, no label applied to Christopher Hitchens. I think he worked hard to achieve that.

We often seem to treat consistency of thought as a sign of character. Politicians and pundits are applauded for repeating themselves. Observers and activists say, "Aha!" if they discover a distance between what some public figure believed five years or five months ago, and what they say today. Compromise is difficult when changing your beliefs is taken to be a moral cave-in instead of the sign of a curious, lively mind.

But I wonder if always making consistency into a virtue is wise for anyone. Why strive to enjoy a rich life, filled with the deep, transforming experiences of family, travel, learning, love, daring, triumph and loss if you're determined just to cling to the same ideas that you've always had?

I think Christopher Hitchens enjoyed his rumpled, smoking, tippling, blue-eyed lizard caricature. But he was also a prolific and inspired writer, and a restless thinker who challenged his own certitudes. He thought and drank deeply and gabbed with people for hours on end wherever he went and let his thoughts be shaken by life. He was aggressively inconsistent.

"There are days when I miss my old convictions as if they were an amputated limb," Christopher Hitchens wrote recently. "But in general I feel better, and no less radical, and you will feel better too, I guarantee, once you leave hold of the doctrinaire and allow your chainless mind to do its own thinking."

Just Because

2011-12-07T20:56:00.001-05:00

Paul Newman at the Venice Film Festival, 1963:

Brotherly Love

2011-11-14T07:35:00.001-05:00

Chase made this for Chloe. So sweet:

"Simpsons" Horror

2011-11-10T10:03:00.006-05:00

I'm old enough to have really fond memories of the early years of "The Simpsons," back when it was so new and different and so was the Fox channel.

Now that my kids are older, I thought it might be fun to watch the annual Halloween "Treehouse of Horror" episode together. I tried it last year and they were just bored. We tried again this year, with mixed results. Well, the best result was when Emma turned to me and said, "This is just so disrespectful!" Yes, that was the idea always, that was the charm of the show.

But this year the show also skewed one of my favorite books, "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly," morphing it into "The Diving Bell and the Butterball." Homer communicates only through farting. A much better review can be found here, and I agree with the writer, Tim Surette, that this was just bizarre, a bit of a horror all around. Sorry kids.

Just in Time for Winter

2011-10-31T16:51:00.000-04:00

This awesome video showing how to tie a scarf:

Chase Loves This

2011-10-24T18:39:00.002-04:00

And I do, too:

So True...

2011-10-13T07:22:00.001-04:00

I've heard all of these statements, but not from ants.

Random Portrait

2011-10-11T07:18:00.003-04:00

This recently appeared on the marker board, courtesy of Chloe. I love that it's labeled, "Mom," just in case. Although since I don't always wear my glasses, that is helpful. And I'm not this thin.

Run to Them

2011-10-08T13:35:00.003-04:00

There are many nights when I am exhausted and I'll say to the kids, "My pajamas are calling my name." Recently, Emma quipped, "Run to them, Mom, run to them!" And while I don't exactly run to them, it is nice for the day to be over.

Wilco

2011-10-04T21:39:00.003-04:00

I really like Wilco, but don't usually laugh hearing Jeff Tweedy. Here, I can't stop as he recites "My Humps," by the Black Eyed Peas:

"I'm gonna do all of this." Great line. Watch it all. Enjoy.

It Must Have Been Hiding

2011-10-03T13:32:00.002-04:00

This weekend, while rummaging for lunch, I found a Lean Pocket in the freezer with a best used by date of 2005. SIX YEARS AGO. Which means I likely purchased it years before then. (I didn't eat it, I pitched it, I'm sure it was hiding all these years.)

As Chase pointed out, I might have bought it when he was two. And as he further pointed out, I could go buy another today and ignore it until he goes to college in EIGHT years.

I teased him that when he comes home from college, I could feed it to him. "Yeah," he said, "antique food. Yum."

Rainbow Prayer

2011-10-02T10:04:00.003-04:00

The tiny trolls who work at Amazon analyzing my buying habits recently suggested I might like Attachments, by Rainbow Rowell. Those little trolls know me well.

First of all, what an awesome name: Rainbow Rowell. And then the author continues the awesome nameness by having one of her central characters named Beth, which is rare, let me tell you. I read the book crazy fast, really loved it. I also loved the following passage, which is not particularly central to the story, but just one of Rainbow's many great nuggets:

(One of the main characters has been single too long and he's confiding in a friend about a possibility)

"It's a girl!" Christine whispered as soon as Dave had gone. "Our prayers are finally answered! Tell me all about her."

"Have you really been praying for me?" Lincoln asked.

"Of course," she said. "I pray for everyone we care about. Plus, I like to pray for things that seem possible. There are so many things that I pray for that seem almost too big even for God. It's rewarding to pray for something that might actually happen. It kind of keeps me going. Sometimes, I just pray for a bumper crop of zucchini or for a good night's sleep."

Why?

2011-09-29T17:07:00.002-04:00

Emma is often up late with homework, often up later than the rest of us. So it was surprising when I recently found her in her room while we were all still upright. I then made the unusual move of lying down on her bed, in the spot where the dog Charlie usually sleeps for the night.

Charlie was really excited by my simple move, she started jumping on and off the bed, running around in circles. Who knew I could rock her world so? Emma and I laughed, assuming Charlie was thinking, "Why is this happening? What does it mean?"

While it was funny to see her so excited, I can relate to being confused, sometimes, often.

Why is this happening?

What does it mean?

I often don't have any better answers than Charlie.

Dark

2011-09-28T23:29:00.002-04:00

The nearer the dawn, the darker the night.

~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Yes

2011-09-27T13:52:00.007-04:00

From one of my design-blog addictions, Desire to Inspire. The composition is pretty, but I especially like the art.

Autumn

2011-09-23T08:48:00.002-04:00

by Emily Dickinson

The morns are meeker than they were,
The nuts are getting brown;
The berry's cheek is plumper,
The rose is out of town.

The maple wears a gayer scarf,
The field a scarlet gown.
Lest I should be old-fashioned,
I'll put a trinket on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Today is the official first day of fall, and I could list here an explanation of why it's this day, what it means weather-wise, but what it really means is that we are in my favorite season. I like 'em all, but fall is so lovely. Maybe because it is so short, it is so sweet.

Lazy

2011-09-20T10:44:00.003-04:00

"My memory is a lazy creature."

So lazy, that I can't remember where I read that fabulous line, but I did and it speaks to me. And explains why I have a blog: my memory is a lazy creature.

What Kind of Pencil Are You?

2011-09-19T10:47:00.007-04:00

We go through a lot of pencils at our house. They are always missing and always turning up under the couch cushions or in the dog bed or, one time, in Chase's hair. I have suspected before that Emma eats them, she goes through so many. Charlie does, in fact, eat them.

This chart is a fun pencil-personality test -- except that we all tend to love and use mechanical pencils even more. What does that mean?

(Pencils from The Well-Appointed Desk)

Instructions

2011-09-16T09:32:00.003-04:00

Emma is working on a speech for her English class and she includes this poem. I love it and know it and asked her where she found it, unsure if I'd posted here or on the fridge or where. She said she wasn't sure, it's "just around." Which is a nice way for writing to exist and slip into your life.

Instructions, by Sheri Hostetler

Instructions
Give up the world; give up self; finally, give up God.
Find god in rhododendrons and rocks,
passers-by, your cat.
Pare your beliefs, your absolutes.
Make it simple; make it clean.
No carry-on luggage allowed.
Examine all you have
with a loving and critical eye, then
throw away some more.
Repeat. Repeat.
Keep this and only this:
what your heart beats loudly for
what feels heavy and full in your gut.
There will only be one or two
things you will keep,
and they will fit lightly
in your pocket.

Mile Ride

2011-07-25T19:58:00.002-04:00

While recently visiting relatives, we met an amazing man who will soon be 100. He still paints, reads, goes out to lunch, talks about books, adores his grandchildren and great-grandchildren. At one point during our visit, I heard some noise coming from their garage - he rides a mile every day on an exercise bike. When I told the kids that he rides a mile every day in the garage, Chase said, "In the garage?"

I said, "Well, I'd hate to see him trying the hills around here."

Chase came back with, "In circles?"

I explained how he uses an exercise bike to ride his mile every day.

He's an amazing man, but I think it would be a challenge to ride a mile in a garage at any age.

Layover

2011-07-24T08:35:00.003-04:00

We recently experienced an unexpected, unusually long layover in Denver, late at night, thanks to summer storms. We actually experienced this twice, both coming and going on our trip, but on the way out it was especially difficult since our bodies were still on Eastern time.

My kids asked me if they could lie down on the floor, and I said "no way." As we dragged our tired selves around the airport out of boredom, we passed scores of adults lying down on the floor. My kids looked at me questioningly.

"Their mothers aren't here," was all I could say.

Do You Know Why I Pulled You Over?

2011-07-16T10:44:00.002-04:00

My kids were appalled, how could he pull me over when I was going the same speed as all the traffic? The rabble rousing quieted as I rolled down my window and he asked if I knew what I'd done wrong.

Do certain answers guarantee a ticket and other answers guarantee a ride in the police car?

I guessed it was for speeding, admitted that I didn't know how fast I was going, then guessed at what the speed limit was. I basically sounded stupid. After he let me go anyway, we brainstormed worse answers to the question:

Is it because I've been drinking?

Was it the weaving?

I hardly tapped that car.

They didn't need those side mirrors.

It was the other guy's fault.

Because I'm a fugitive?

Because I don't have a license for these firearms?

I have a medical need for those drugs.

And (my favorite), Is it because I'm nude?

I don't think I know anyone who drives nude (but I'm not always aware of the speed limit, either), but right after the officer let us go, we saw a billboard that said, "Don't Drive Nude." This led to an interesting discussion with my children on the legalities of driving nude. You could get pulled over for that, I bet.

Random Weirdness

2011-07-12T14:22:00.002-04:00

This is one of many random drawings that appear around here. This one is meant to bother Chase and, go figure, it does. So, his sister was successful, but only because siblings can be so good at being annoying to each other, no matter the content or method or fowl.

Shaking with Strength

2011-07-11T13:43:00.002-04:00

I've been "practicing" yoga for years, but every time I go, I feel like a beginner again. A favorite encouragement from the teachers: "Shaking with Strength." When I struggle through various poses (most) and am shaking (much), I don't necessarily feel so very strong, but it's a good way to look at it. Yoga and other things in life. Shaking with Strength.

Ingrid Michaelsock

2011-07-05T13:32:00.000-04:00

I love Ingrid Michaelson's music, but somehow missed the opportunity to enter her contest for "Ingrid Michaelsock." This is my favorite, the third place winner, by Amber Karlins:

I think it's an awesome Ingrid and I really love the album covers in the background. You can see more sock-likenesses at Ingrid's site.

Mama by Emma

2011-07-04T08:04:00.000-04:00

June 2011

New to Us

2011-07-03T10:31:00.001-04:00

Not too long ago, I had a moment where I realized I just couldn't drive my old minivan one more moment. So, I traded it in for a new-to-us used car. My old car didn't have a name, but we decided the new ride needed a name and, after some debate, settled on Perdita. We thought it meant "pretty little one" in Spanish. It actually means "lost" in Latin. The name has stuck.

One of Perdita's charming features is that she can take off her top. Sort of. She's not a convertible, but she has a sunroof, which we have been enjoying as much as possible. We've never had one before and it's been a learning experience. Chloe told me that as I was driving and closing the sunroof one day, she saw my hair flying around and up as the sunroof began to close and she wondered if my hair would get caught. She told me this after I closed it. I asked her at what point she might have said something to me -- would it be when I began to be pulled upward out of the driver's seat or when I screamed or when I just no longer had any hair attached to the front of my head? (My hair didn't get caught, thanks to physics, not any warnings from passengers.)

Another time, I left Chase in the car while I ran a quick errand (it was a really quick one!), but while I was in the store, I could hear a sudden downpour on the roof and bolted for the car -- since the sunroof and windows were open. I found Chase standing on his seat, hunched over and blocking the rain coming in the sunroof with his body. I guess it's a rainroof, too.

Flow Chart

2011-07-02T12:49:00.001-04:00

Things mysteriously appear on my desktop, such as this visual of a great song:

I found it officially on Flowing Data, in which you will find time quickly flowing away -- data so visually appealing is addictive.

When 3 Equals 5

2011-04-10T09:05:00.000-04:00

I was trying to figure out how many Weight Watcher points to assign to the two yummy chocolate chip cookies I had eaten (yes, there's a link there), but the nutritional information listed one serving as three cookies. Three cookies equaled 5 points.

I asked Chase, who is working on fractions and percentages in school, "So, if three is 5 points, how many points would only two cookies be?"

Without missing a beat, he said, "Just have another cookie."

Happy Friday

2011-04-01T17:12:00.000-04:00

He's aging well. Just sayin'. The articles are really good, too.

Sometimes

2011-03-25T20:06:00.002-04:00

The Fun One

2011-03-18T20:10:00.001-04:00

When I came out of yoga last week, I had the following text message:

Message: Sorry about last nite. Guy at work gave me his phone and AT&T supposedly transferred my contacts but none transferred. We were at AT&T again last night having them fix it, but this phone was dead. Had to charge overnight.
Me: Who is this? [I ask, having no idea at all]
Reply: Your pal Rachel. Lol
[I don't have a "pal" Rachel]
Me: Which Rachel? [trying to be diplomatic]
Reply: The fun one!!! Your soul sister.
[so wishing I knew this fun soul sister!]
Me: Who are you texting?
Reply: ?
Me: Who is this?
Reply: Rachel _____
Me: I think you are texting the wrong number
Reply: This is not Lisa ____?
Me: No, sorry.

Nearly had a soul sister. If only I was Lisa!

And the Nominees Are...

2011-02-02T09:42:00.000-05:00

Every year, I wish I had seen all the Best Picture Oscar nominees. Every year, I see a few of them. This year, thanks to my beloved Paste, I enjoyed seeing the nominees Lego-ized. Alex Eylar creates more than just movie scenes with Legos, check out his Flickr photos for a parallel Lego universe. An amazing distraction from the ice outside.

My favorite for Best Picture, "The King's Speech." (Of course, I would watch Colin Firth read the newspaper.)

Pliers

2011-01-31T15:04:00.000-05:00

Chase was telling me how painful his canker sore was. When my reply began with, "I'll get my pliers...," the kids' faces were priceless, eyes wide in shock. I'm not sure what they were thinking -- "I'll get my pliers and tear it off"? I needed the pliers to open the lid on the tiny medicine bottle.

But if laughter heals, he might be better already.

Vivian

2011-01-29T08:26:00.000-05:00

Vivian survived the flood in the basement. She was my grandmother's favorite doll, so she must be nearly 100 years old. She had been retired to a trunk in the corner of the basement, but I saved her and have sent her to live with my mother, partly because Vivian scares Emma and really scares the dog Charlie.

She looks a little rough, which is how I looked at times during the past week.

Happy Friday

2011-01-14T08:59:00.001-05:00

This morning, in the dark and cold winter, I took Emma to the bus. As we waited in the warm car, we saw a friendly visitor to the bus stop, a big brown lab thrilled to find a collection of kids clearly just waiting for him! He boisterously greeted them and when the bus pulled up, he climbed on! Emma said he was really friendly, crawling onto laps. He must have thought he'd hit the jackpot, he'd just go to school with all these kids! It was the most enthusiasm I've ever seen at a high school bus stop at 7 a.m., although it also was the hairiest enthusiast.

Surprise, Surprise

2010-12-15T09:30:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, on the first day of Emma's first high school finals, this is the text exchange we shared:

Me: Are you in detention?
Emma: Yes
Me: Wow. How is it? Are they treating you well?
Emma: They have us chained to the desks, took our iPods, currently watching them burn
Me: Hide your phone! Do you need a ride once you run for freedom? I can be your get-away driver.
Emma: Pull up, cut the engine, act natural.
Me: I'll be in the wig and dark glasses. Don't call me by name.

Churchill Cheer

2010-12-14T07:53:00.000-05:00

"If you're going through hell, keep going."
-- Winston Churchill

Illustration by Robert Patricy.

Best Friends

2010-12-13T19:23:00.000-05:00

My little stalker dog, Mimi, wouldn't actually cut me, I'm sure I could take the food out of her mouth if I tried. But otherwise, this is spot-on (pun intended):

From Sheldon Comics, thanks to Emma for sharing.

Maybe Next Year

2010-12-11T18:28:00.004-05:00

Incurable

2010-11-27T11:42:00.000-05:00

From The Writer's Almanac, a poem by Sharon Olds, "Diagnosis."

By the time I was six months old, she knew something
was wrong with me. I got looks on my face
she had not seen on any child
in the family, or the extended family,
or the neighborhood. My mother took me in
to the pediatrician with the kind hands,
a doctor with a name like a suit size for a wheel:
Hub Long. My mom did not tell him
what she thought in truth, that I was Possessed.
It was just these strange looks on my face—
he held me, and conversed with me,
chatting as one does with a baby, and my mother
said, She's doing it now! Look!
She's doing it now! and the doctor said,
What your daughter has
is called a sense
of humor. Ohhh, she said, and took me
back to the house where that sense would be tested
and found to be incurable.

I Clearly Need to Start Drinking

2010-11-23T19:53:00.002-05:00

Red Bull, if this is what it does for this guy. Chloe showed me this amazing video. And the music is fantastic, too.

Dear Blank

2010-11-13T19:48:00.002-05:00

Appropriately, the day after I post a letter -- indulge yourself with really funny letters on "Dear Blank, Please Blank," a website more fun than most. The photos alone are worth a visit.

One of my favorites:
Dear Busy Students,
You should check if you have any Facebook notifications. Oh, and check your email. Also, there's this great new video on Youtube that you should watch.
Sincerely,
The Internet

Emma found another gem:
Dear Homework,
Please try and be as entertaining as the internet.
Sincerely,
Students

Started Early, Took My Dog

2010-11-12T11:08:00.001-05:00

Dear Kate Atkinson,

I recently finished your wonderful book, "Started Early, Took My Dog," the fourth in your series with Jackson Brodie. This was as good as the others, and worth ordering from Amazon UK since it's not yet out stateside. I'm impatient for Jackson and for your writing. I love when you describe a particularly unsavory character as a "berserker," who later "meerkatted to attention." Such descriptions are such fun.

Your main character, former private detective Jackson Brodie, is irresistible to me as well and would be such fun. Tell Louise already. My friend Heather loves your books, too, and has skillfully cast Gerard Butler as Jackson in any movie version. We have debated this more than we'd like to admit. He can't be too pretty, he can't be too young. What do you think? Does Gerard work? (Enoy the photo, at least:)

With much admiration and thanks!
One of your many reader fans

Veteran's Day 2010

2010-11-11T11:30:00.001-05:00

This morning, Chase sang with his school choir for the Veteran's Day program. I don't know if most schools have Veteran's Day programs, but this was a nice one, with a Lieutenant Colonel teaching the kids about veterans and being thankful for their service. Before the program began, I was reading Kate Braestrup's new book, "Beginner's Grace," and the following passage seemed appropriate:

True gratitude isn't cringing or uncomfortable at all: It is the purest expression of joy. Ungrateful people--you may have met a few--are not happy people. If we humans were making good use of our consciousness, we would wander around in a flabbergasted daze of gratitude all the time: I could be hungry...but instead, I've got french fries! There could be nothing...but instead, there's something!

The program was lovely, as is gratitude.

Nowhere Hair

2010-11-09T14:57:00.001-05:00

My addiction to design blogs does more than feed my habit. It also often leads me to other wonderful things, such as this beautiful book by Sue Glader. I read about "Nowhere Hair" on DesignMom and quickly ordered a copy for a friend whose wife recently lost her hair through breast cancer and chemo. Their kids had mixed reactions to mom being bald, just as the child narrator of "Nowhere Hair" does.

This lovely book is positive, and the illustrations by Edith Buenen are lively and fun. Author Sue Glader, who based the book on her own experiences, sounds lively and fun, too. "I got lemons. This is my margarita," says Glader. Find out more at http://www.nowherehair.com/. Cheers!

Beginner's Grace

2010-11-08T11:40:00.001-05:00

Kate Braestrup is one of my favorite writers and, consequently, I regularly ~~stalk~~ check her website, hoping that she might be speaking in public within a five or six-hour drive from me. My favorite writers tend to be ones who have spoken to me at a time in my life when I needed to hear them. If I'd read them earlier or later, they might not have made the cut. Other writers, who by all accounts are incredible, don't make the cut simply because their special message wasn't special to me, right then. The same is true of music and songs.

"Here If You Need Me," by Braestrup, came out in August of 2007, at a time when I needed to hear her. It is a memoir of her journey of grief after her husband was killed and she eventually found herself becoming a Unitarian-Universalist minister and chaplain for the Maine Warden Service. She doesn't work with prisoners, whe works with the Warden Service on search and rescues, which often don't end well, offering counsel and prayer to the survivors.

I read "Here If You Need Me," right after my sweet sister-in-law, Katie, was killed, and I took great comfort in Braestrup's book. I was already grieving my father, who had died the year before, and read plenty in the grief genre for a while -- Joan Didion's "The Year of Magical Thinking," Rob Sheffield's "Love is a Mix Tape: Love and Loss, One Song at a Time," Elizabeth McCracken's "An Exact Replica of a Figment of My Imagination."

Last night, I discovered that Braestrup has a new book, "Beginner's Grace: Bringing Prayer to Life." I also found that she had cancelled several appearances -- her grandson, who was born on October 22, had died. My oldest was born on October 22 as well. I remember her birth, I was scared (I was scared for each of them), and it was complicated. Every time I pushed, her heartrate nearly disappeared. The doctor asked us if she could "go after her." We didn't even know what she meant, but of course said "yes." The doctor quickly yanked her out with foreceps, unwrapped the cord three times from her tiny neck, and pronounced her fine. As I read, my daughter practiced her cello, a sweet sad accompaniment to this tragic news.

Braestrup's grandson, named for his deceased grandfather, died on October 27 from complications from birth. October 27 was Katie's birthday. Words can offer great comfort and grace and sometimes still not be enough.

Fall Behind

2010-11-07T07:55:00.001-05:00

Today we get an extra hour. I find it a goofy idea, but I'll take the hour. Yesterday, The New York Times published six poems to mark the end of daylight savings time. I like several, but especially the following, "Free" by James Tate:

Free

I was always thinking about her even when I wasn’t thinking. Days went by when I did little else. She had left me one night as a complete surprise. I didn’t know where she went. I didn’t know if she was ever coming back. I searched her dresser and closet for any clues. There wasn’t anything there, nothing. No lotions or creams in the bathroom. She had really cleaned out. I thought back on our years together. They seemed happy to me. Summers on the beach, winters in the mountains skiing. What more could she want? We had friends, dinner parties. I walked around thinking, maybe she didn’t love me all that time. I felt so alone without her. I hated dinners alone, I hated going to bed without her. I thought she might at least call, so I was never very far from the phone. Weeks went by, months. It was strange how time flew by when you had nothing to remember it by. My friends never mentioned her. Why can’t they say something? I thought. I remembered every tiny gesture of her hand, every smile, every grimace. Birthdays, anniversaries — I never forgot. But then something strange started to happen. I started doubting every memory. Even her face began to fade. The trip to Majorca, was it something I read in a book? The jolly dinner parties, were they a dream? I didn’t trust anything any longer. I searched the house for any trace of her. Nothing. I started asking my friends if they remembered anything about her. They looked at me as if I were crazy. I sat at home and began to cheer up. What if none of this happened? I thought. What if there was nothing to be sad about?

8 Tracks

2010-11-06T21:12:00.000-04:00

I'm old enough - barely - to remember 8 track tapes. They came before microwaves, when polyester ruled the land. I don't think it was too long before cassette tapes replaced their dominance, but I'm also old enough to have to admit that when I graduated from college, I didn't yet have a cd player. How old am I?

I recently rediscovered new and improved 8tracks. Maybe everyone else already knows about this crazy cool website of LEGAL music sharing (not that legality is a sticking point for me). As the site explains itself, "8tracks is handcrafted internet radio. It offers a simple way for people to share and discover music through an online mix, a short playlist containing at least 8 tracks."

Try to stop at just 8. And be glad you don't need an 8-track player to listen. In my memory, 8-track players were the size of early microwaves, or about half the size of a Mini Coop. Another musical blast from the past is honored in Tift Merritt's "Mixtape." I already dated myself with the 8 track reference, a mix tape (cassette) mention tells anthropologists that I survived the meteor that wiped out the dinosaurs.

Pets on Furniture

2010-10-25T20:15:00.000-04:00

My kind of dog.

Well, on Mondays, I like all kinds of dogs and cats, because on Mondays, I feed my addiction to "Pets on Furniture," on the wonderful design blog Desire to Inspire. Really, "Pets on Furniture" makes Mondays so much better. And I know that I'm not the only one who lets their pets on the furniture. Or into a game of dominos. Enjoy.

Enabler

2010-10-22T15:29:00.000-04:00

That's what Chloe is, an enabler. As we were zooming through the grocery store, I successfully passed by the Hostess HoHo's on sale more than once. When I said, "I shouldn't get those, should I?" Chloe quickly said, "Yes, you should! They're good for your soul." They're good, that's for sure. Good and almost gone.

Supposedly, a San Francisco bakery began hand-producing the Swiss-filled chocolate cakes in 1967 (a very good year). And for freshness, they have a maximum shelf life of two weeks from date of purchase. No worries about them lasting more than two weeks from date of purchase at my home!

Happy Friday!

Quick! Get Comfy!

2010-10-16T21:37:00.000-04:00

That's what Chase exclaimed, "Quick! Get comfy!" as we were tucking into bed for stories. "I see the cat!" Meaning, Milo was on his way to settle in for stories, too. And once he's picked his spot, woe to the person who realizes they might like to roll over or stretch the other direction. He takes his half out of the middle, finds the sweet spot, and doesn't budge. Quick! Get comfy!

Here's Milo on a sweater, thinking about watching "National Treasure." And no, he's not really on the kitchen table; it just looks like he is.

Where's My Wand?

2010-10-09T07:18:00.001-04:00

Where IS my wand? That would be a handy accessory.

With no wand to magically accomplish anything, I distracted myself from such industriousness my usual way: I thoroughly enjoyed reading "Where's My Wand?" by Eric Poole. Subtitled, "One Boy's Magical Triumph over Alienation and Shag Carpeting," this book really shows how Poole grew from his childhood beliefs in both religion and the magic of "Bewitched." You have to be a child of the 70s to appreciate how great that show was. I adored Samantha, if not her nerdy husband, but Poole tuned into another character.

"But whom to model myself after? True, Sam was young and beautiful and smart, but her mother, Endora--there was someone with style. Someone with a flair for the dramatic."

Poole, with a flair for the dramatic, channeled Endora and, swathed in an old bedspread, became "The Captain of Chenille." (Baby, do that to me one more time.) He tried to conjure happy scenes that never quite worked out in his reality of crazy family and school bullies.

Poole has a wonderful way with words and nails the details of adolescence in the 70s, the eternal cruelty of junior high, and how hard it is to be the younger sibling when the older sister gets too busy to play Monopoly anymore.

"I, on the other hand, was willing to devote my time and attention to her 24/7. Truth be told, this was not so much a generosity of spirit as the fact that seventh grade had not been a good year. I hated junior high, a brick penal colony that housed all the most heinous people from elementary school plus several hundred new students vying for the title."

Throughout his childhood, Poole turns to and away from his Bewitched persona and his organized religion, eventually realizing that he could rely on himself, an empowering message for anyone. No wand required.

Try to Make Sense

2010-10-07T07:04:00.003-04:00

Nick Horby, Ben Folds, and Pomplamoose collaborating in this super awesome videosong:

Watch to the end.

Make Up Your Own Caption

2010-10-06T06:46:00.000-04:00

Chase and Olivia, playing on my computer. Enough said.

Song for the Weekend

2010-09-25T12:50:00.001-04:00

Ryan Bingham

"The Poet" from the album Junky Star

The line I love: "...if my horse ain't too drunk."

Welcome to the World

2010-09-21T21:16:00.000-04:00

I love this photo -- the baby seems to be looking at the world with wonder and the daddy is looking at the baby with wonder:

Sunday Funny

2010-09-19T10:07:00.000-04:00

Yes, That's a Hat

2010-09-15T12:50:00.000-04:00

This is my favorite from a New York Times photo essay on the Royal Ascot race and the extraordinary hats worn by brave, fashionable women:

Before and After

2010-09-13T12:35:00.000-04:00

Frankie, our sweet hedgehog, spends his nights rearranging this cage. I think he has a decorator gene in him; he just knows the igloo would look better a little to the left. No matter his motivation, he makes such amazing progress under cover of darkness that Chloe and I decided to take before and after photos to show his handiwork.

The before, taken about 10 pm:

The after, taken about 7 am the next morning:

It's often more dramatic.

Unprepared

2010-09-12T08:57:00.000-04:00

"When Did I Get Like This?" is a really funny book for anyone who has kids (or has a mother, really). Author Amy Wilson finds the funny in so many moments as the mother of three young children. I laughed so hard I often cried, both of which happen a lot mothering little (and big) children. Wilson also has authored an off-Broadway show called Mother Load.

In one of the last chapters of the book, she details a trip flying to Florida with her kids and the baby is violently and comically sick the entire plane ride. I cannot tell you how funny this chapter is. But at the end of the trip, Wilson questions what she did wrong and writes the following bit of hard-earned wisdom:

In my hubris, I had thought I was ready for every conceivable thing that could happen on that plane, and I was still left unprepared. But holding on to the monorail pole, I realized: being a mother is like that. Again and again, motherhood will throw things at me for which I will feel, and may indeed be, completely unprepared. What will decide whether or not I am a good mother is not whether I am ready for such times, but how I move through the door.

She moves through the door with a lot of humor, which goes a long way in mothering.

Back to School

2010-09-11T08:15:00.002-04:00

My kids have been in school for a month already, so their backs are strong/sore from carrying their overloaded backpacks. Emma recently weighed hers and it was 18 pounds. This girl could be Emma, with her cello and soccer ball, but Emma doesn't have dance shoes.

Friday Funny

2010-09-10T15:43:00.000-04:00

The night before Chloe's 13th birthday, Emma wanted to do something special for her. So she silenced Chloe's phone, then she sent a message to everyone she knew to text Chloe a birthday greeting. Soon, Emma had a reply alerting her that she had given out the incorrect phone number for Chloe. Some random stranger was already receiving an outpouring of birthday wishes. Emma quickly sent a new message and Chloe awoke to many kind messages.

The day of Chloe's 13th birthday, a friend of hers wanted to do something special for her. So she made her a banner for her locker and had people sign it. Eventually, Chloe heard about the banner, which was on the wrong locker, nowhere near her own.

The night of Chloe's 13th birthday, her mother took her to pick out her favorite Dairy Queen Blizzard cake. She wrote out exactly what she wanted on the cake, the unoriginal but meaningful, "Happy Birthday Chloe!" Moments later, they went home with a cake that said, "Happy Birthday Cloe!!"

I think Chloe/Cloe had a good birthday.

Litany

2010-08-27T15:14:00.000-04:00

Two versions of a poetry reading.
Notice how much they both fidget.
And Billy Collins is the one with the bedhead.

The Tower, The Zoo, and The Tortoise

2010-08-24T13:51:00.001-04:00

I bought this book in Boston, I had read good reviews, and I wanted a book to remember my trip to Hahvard. But it's really about London (which I love), really the Tower of London. No, it's really about grief (which I don't love, but have some experience in), although it's funny and charming and interesting and there are a lot of animals involved.

There was a time in my life when I concentrated my reading in the grief genre. It was comforting and often very well written. Some of my favorite books are memoirs of grief, which really are stories about the survivors of grief (which is all of us). And several of the characters in this book are surviving, if barely. The author, Julia Stuart, describes it so very well. Here is one of her nuggets of wonderfulness:

The following week, unable to bear seeing it any longer, she put it [the urn] in the wardrobe until they had decided upon Milo's final resting place. But each time one of them brought up the subject, the other, suddenly caught off guard, had felt too bruised to reply. So it remained at the back of the shelf behind Hebe Jones's sweaters. And every night, before turning off her bedside light, the mother would find an excuse to open the wardrobe doors and silently wish her child goodnight, unable to abandon the ritual she had performed for eleven years.

(I have a friend who lost her mother and husband in short succession. She had both of their urns in closets, not sure where to put them forever. The two never got along in life, so she kept them in seperate closets.)

This book would make a great movie; there are many interesting characters and the setting is wonderful. The animals and ghosts and history just add to the human dramedy. But some scenes might not translate so well to the screen:

Hebe Jones sat alone on the sofa trying to answer her own question as the cracks of her heart opened.

I'm not giving away any spoilers by sharing these bits -- you'll need to read the book to enjoy it fully.

Aliens

2010-08-23T20:52:00.001-04:00

The excitement of back-to-school has dampened a bit as the homework piles up and the schedules fill up. Emma and Chase both bought folders for school featuring the aliens from the "Toy Story" movies. Their folders are exactly the same, they both bring them home every day.

I'm just waiting for the morning when they get them switched and Chase goes to fourth grade with Emma's AP World History homework and Emma goes to high school with Chase's spelling list.

My Kids

2010-08-21T10:13:00.000-04:00

Shortly after Chase and his bff Olivia had enjoyed giving Calvin and Hobbes, the guinea pigs, their first-ever bath (not sure how much the pigs enjoyed it), I needed to leave the house. Chase and Olivia were on to find some other adventure. Now, we have long known that if Chase and Olivia are giggling wildly, it's best to check on them because two heads are better than one at finding mischief.

As I was leaving, I said to Emma, who was attached to the computer, "Remember, you have to actually check on Chase and Olivia now and then." She indignantly replied, "I do! I always listen for the screaming."

Just Kids

2010-08-15T20:18:00.000-04:00

My mother, of all people, highly recommended this memoir by Patti Smith, the Godmother of Punk. She spent a day doing nothing but reading this, telling me it was an amazing love story.

"Just Kids" covers Smith's early years in New York City, when she arrived penniless in 1967 (the year I was born) and promptly met Robert Mapplethorpe. The two were starving artists and clung to each other during their extremely lean early years. I promptly fell into a spell, reading about their love and lifelong friendship.

I remember Mapplethorpe's name only from the wild controversy that erupted in 1989 when his photographs were called pornography and ignited a national debate on publicly-funded art. I knew a photographer who explained to me, slowly, why his photos were beautiful, but they simply weren't that interesting to me at the time. Smith's book shows the genius behind it all, from an intimate point of view, from the very beginning.

Smith shows her own evolution as an artist with little direction to someone who expresses herself through art, poetry, and rock and roll. She crossed paths with Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Andy Warhol, and Allen Ginsberg. She loved and learned from Mapplethorpe, Sam Shephard, and Blue Oyster Cult keyboardist Allen Lanier, among others.

In her book, Smith recounts a pivotal moment early in her career when she gave a poetry reading in memory of Jim Morrison on Friday the 13th. I was under her spell for most of Friday, August 13th, reading her beautiful writing of being just kids with her first amazing love. It was a lucky day for me.

This Is Dinner

2010-08-08T07:24:00.000-04:00

"So, this is dinner?"

Chase regularly asks this question, though not in a derisive way, just confirming that the pile of food on his plate counts as a meal. Because he'll have a few more dinners before bed, because he's a growing boy, I guess. I'm not sure where it all goes, Chase is a skinny growing boy, but it takes more than one dinner to feed him.

We've been thoroughly enjoying watching last season's episodes of "The Office," where Pam and Jim have a baby. There's a funny sub-story line involving Kevin and Pam eating together all day. They call their meals "second breakfast, lunch, second lunch, and first dinner," and plan an "Ultra Feast."

I always answer Chase, "Yes, this is dinner." Maybe he would like the Ultra Feast?

Literally Scurrying

2010-08-03T21:23:00.000-04:00

I’m reading this fantastic book, The Imperfectionists, by Tom Rachman. It’s about a crew of characters working at an English newspaper in Rome. The chapter on the Corrections Editor is great -- he’s crazy about making corrections and catching errors. He keeps updating a detailed “style guide” for the paper and here is one of his entries:

literally: This word should be deleted. All too often, actions described as “literally” did not happen at all. As in, “He literally jumped out of his skin.” No, he did not. Though if he literally had, I’d suggest raising the element and proposing the piece for page one. Inserting “literally” willy-nilly reinforces the notion that breathless nitwits lurk within this newsroom. Eliminate on sight – the usage, not the nitwits. The nitwits are to be captured and placed in the cages I have set up in the subbasement. See also: Excessive Dashes; Exclamation Points; and Nitwits.

I think I need to delete from my vocabulary the word “scurry.” Here’s my poor attempt at imitation:

scurry: This word should be deleted. All too often, this word describes termite activity when the lights are turned on. As in, “The termites scurried undercover when I went to the kitchen for some wine.” If people are scurrying, they appear hunched and sideways-ish and should just walk upright -- as they can. Eliminate on sight (or sound) – both the usage and the termites; just encourage the people to stand up. If the people continue to scurry about, shove them under the refrigerator.

Any Kindness Helps

2010-07-31T17:31:00.001-04:00

Today, while running errands (all of which cost money), I was stuck in a long, slow line of traffic, surrounded by consumers out spending. I noticed a young man walking along the side of the road, a messy pack on his back and a dog at his side. While traffic sat, he crossed over and stood at the intersection, opening a worn cardboard sign that said, "Any Kindness Helps."

On any given day, there's a chance I will hand out money or food to someone asking, although not as often as I should. And yes, the dog got to me, too. I hope they are good companions, no matter what they are doing or where they are going, the boy and his dog. They both looked like they could use a bath. The sign was what tipped me over to giving him some money, although not as much as I could have. It's so true: any kindness helps.

(I know it could be a scam, sure, he could make a nice pile of money standing on corners looking scruffy, he could be feeding his drug habit, I know, but he also could be hungry and I am not.)

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
-- Plato

Inception

2010-07-24T17:57:00.000-04:00

A friend and I were talking about going to see a movie. Somehow, I said the following, "Let's go see that new Leonardo DiCrapio movie." It's a crazy slip of the tongue, because I like Leo and his movies. Surely, he heard that plenty -- in third grade. I doubt he hears that much anymore. And I hear the movie, "Inception," is really good.

Precious and the Puggies

2010-07-19T15:04:00.000-04:00

I love Alexander McCall Smith's No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency books. I so love them that I have been known to order the new books from Amazon UK to get them faster (they publish there first; McCall Smith is Scottish). I occassionally avoid cleaning the house by reading about books online, every now and then checking the Amazon UK site, just in case something's coming out and calling my name.

This weekend, I got lucky and found a new one, "Precious and the Puggies." In a frenzy, I ordered it, undeterred by the fact that it's been translated from English into Scots (a glossary is provided!). And it's for children -- this is the first case of Precious Ramotswe, when she was only 8.

According to my email, "Precious and the Puggies" has already been "dispatched" via Royal Mail. I later found it on my Amazon US site. I may be paying a bit extra for the dispatching and the Royal Mail, but fans do crazy things.

French for the Day

2010-07-16T14:24:00.001-04:00

Chloe has a daily calendar with a French phrase for every day. She recently had, "Il ne faut surtout pas paniquer." Above all, one must not panic.

I love to imagine a non-French speaker trying to utter this useful phrase in the kind of situation where it might be needed. Because when people panic, they are so eloquent, oui?

paniquer (pah-nee-kay)
to panic

Happy St. Swithin's Day!

2010-07-15T22:08:00.000-04:00

I never heard of it, either, until I read David Nicholls' incredibly wonderful book, "One Day." Do yourself a favor, go get it and start reading it as soon as you finish reading this.

St. Swithin's Day, July 15, is "observed" in England and the weather is watched: if it rains on St. Swithin's Day, it will for 40 more. If not, then not. The book follows Emma and Dexter, updating the reader every July 15 for 20 years on the couple's evolving relationship. If you want to read a great review, check out John O'Connell's in The Times. His best line is "the grief-stricken hours after I finished the book." I cried when "One Day" ended -- because it ended and I wanted it to go on. Grief is weird that way.

I have too many favorite lines from the book to list here, but O'Connell ends his wonderful review of this wonderful book with a line from the Philip Larkin poem, "The Mower":

We should be careful
Of each other, we should be kind
While there is still time.

And we should read good books, too.

Liberty

2010-07-14T10:26:00.000-04:00

Last month, we had a lovely week in New York City, seeing the sights and people. We went to the Statue of Liberty and fared better than these visitors. The poster is titled, "Planning Your Visit to Liberty Island."

Sugar Overload

2010-07-13T13:39:00.000-04:00

Today I stumbled upon a bonanza of sweetness and cuteness: ZooBorns. This site offers "The Newest and Cutest Exotic Baby Animals from Zoos and Aquariums Around the World."

No, kids, you may NOT have a pet baby otter!

Besides the adorable photos and videos, I was amazed at the list of animals, 161 in all, not just your usual lions and tigers and monkeys. The tawny frogmouths are adorable, the sifakas scare me a bit, the coatis are kinda cute. And all of them are babies! Aww!

World Cup

2010-07-12T21:01:00.001-04:00

As you might have heard, Spain won the World Cup. Below, Spanish sports reporter Sara Carbonero interviews her boyfriend, Iker Casillas, Spain's team captain and goalkeeper.

This is what I like about soccer:

The Summer Day

2010-07-06T20:58:00.006-04:00

by Mary Oliver

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean-
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

Sometimes, the universe sends me a message. Again and again. I recently read this wonderful poem on my brother-in-law John's blog, How to Like It. I so enjoyed it then that I sent it to my best friend.

Today, I read it again, on of-all-places, Design*Sponge, one of my favorite design sites. A very clever someone carved it onto a desk, a lovely idea. I love the jump in the word "precious," working its way around its environment, persevering.

Design*Sponge links the poem to Poetry 180, a Library of Congress site offering "a poem a day for American high schools." What a crazy cool idea.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?

Good Dog

2010-06-30T13:15:00.000-04:00

When I visited my friend Jami recently, I was amazed at how well behaved her dog, Peyton, is. She doesn't jump, she rarely barks, she's friendly, she lets the kids play with her. In fact, she's so good that at the end of the day, she gathers up her own dog toys and puts them in her crate before bed! Really! Throughout the day, her dog toys will be scattered about, mixed in with kid toys, but sometime before bed, she returns them all to her crate. I'm not making this up!

In cross-blog promotion, here's a photo of the wonderful Peyton from Jami's blog:

The caption: No one wishes it would stop raining more than Peyton.

My Favorites

2010-06-25T08:58:00.002-04:00

My co-workers are tiring of me always declining their offers to go to lunch. I'm often running home to see my kids on my lunch hour during the summer. Finally, my friend Heather mockingly said, "They're your favorites, aren't they?!"

I don't think my arrival prompts my kids to scurry about like this, but this is one of my favorite Far Side cartoons, a funny-for-Friday:

Fin, Feather & Fur

2010-06-24T08:36:00.000-04:00

"Did you really go there??" asked my friend Jami when I told her about my rest stop on my way to visiting her near Cleveland. I think she might have giggled before I even replied that, yes, I had stopped at Fin, Feather & Fur Outfitters in Ashland, Ohio.

She said that she and her husband always see the signs for the store when driving to and from Indiana, but have never stopped. I had been driving alone for hours and nature was calling. It was a grubby gas station or this nature-ish mecca. I looked at my choices and decided that there was a good chance that the women's restroom at such a store might not get as much heavy use as the men's and might not be the stuff of nightmares (for me).

The name pretty much says it all. If someone is in the market for bagging an animal with fins, feathers, or fur, this is the place. There was a lot of camouflage and I avoided the cavernous "Archery" section, but I was tired of driving. And I was right about the restrooms.

Lying Only Makes It Worse

2010-06-11T09:42:00.002-04:00

Emma recently texted me that someone had written on the mirror in her bedroom, “Chase HATES Chloe. He HATES her.”

I immediately replied, asking her to clean her mirror. She did. Then, apparently, she texted Chase, asking why he wrote on her mirror. He replied that he had no idea what she was talking about. She persisted, without mentioning the words involved. Eventually, Emma told him, “Chase, lying only makes it worse!”

Later, while she was telling me more about this, Chloe wandered in and had a strange look on her face. SHE had written the words! Ah, the confusion, the insults wrongly attributed, the sentiments and actions assumed.

“Well, it’s true!” she protested, even though he hadn’t written any such a thing. And I would claim that it isn’t true.

The truth is a tricky thing.

Brasil

2010-06-10T09:20:00.001-04:00

For years, I spelled Brazil with an "s," Brasil. Because that's how Brasilians spell it and I lived in Sao Paulo as a child. Only for one year, but it was a good one. Sao Paulo is one of the biggest cities in the world, but my brother and I ran to the corner store on our own, became functionally fluent in Portuguese (long forgotten), and played a game called soccer that we had never played before.

The above photo is of Sugarloaf Mountain in Rio de Janeiro. I think the iconic images of Rio's beaches show a lot more bikinis (or lack of bikinis), but I like this beautiful shot showing a side of something you don't usually see.

Modern Technology

2010-05-16T20:28:00.001-04:00

I can't make this up. While typing something for Chloe for school, every time I typed her name, it was replaced with, "Mwahahahaha, this is going

to get on your nerves SO. BAD."

And it did. It got on my nerves. SO. BAD.

I asked Emma "Why is this doing this?" in a possibly-loud, annoyed voice. Emma

looked guilty and adjusted the auto correct feature that was replacing every instance

of the name "Chloe" with "Mwahahahaha, this is going to get on your nerves SO. BAD."

Sisterly love mixed with modern technology. Mwahahahahaha.

Well, Hello There!

2010-05-11T17:47:00.000-04:00

I'm surprised at how happily the animal species co-exist in our house. I have to attribute some of it to the fat-and-happy nature of them all. Here Milo has the rare treat of actually seeing Pookie, one of the hermit crabs, taking a bath (no privacy around here, no sense of personal space, let me tell you).

I think Pookie's waving to Milo!

Just One More Thing

2010-05-10T18:39:00.001-04:00

Many of my days are filled with me going from one quick task to another and when I get to yet another, I remember more. I go to feed the dogs and get busy with the laundry, I take out the trash and start to pick up sticks. I have, of course, started to boil water for dinner and left it to boil away completely.

I recently asked Chloe to help me put the clean sheets on my bed and then I went forth and delivered more laundry/did dishes/fed some living thing/fill-in-the-blank. When I came back to my bed, I had the lovely surprise that it was already made. And on my bedside table was the following sweet love note:

Preschool Meets Middle School

2010-05-02T21:52:00.000-04:00

Chloe was recently babysitting the adorable Charlotte, who is a talkative four-year-old. Charlotte was telling an extremely detailed story. If you've ever heard a child repeatedly detail the plot of a Sponge Bob episode, you know how this can go. And more power (and patience) to you. Chloe was half listening when Charlotte stopped herself mid-story and asked a very important question, "How do you get sparkles on your eyes?"

The mysteries of the universe. Chloe told her it was eyeshadow. I'm guessing Charlotte will be asking for sparkles soon. I hope her cool babysitter shares.

Awkward!

2010-04-29T22:23:00.004-04:00

Hilarious. Disturbing. Spreading the Awkwardness. Check out Awkward Family Photos and be thankful for your family. This is one of the tamer examples, since there are children in the audience:

Middle School, Part 4

2010-04-27T21:24:00.000-04:00

Or, I do feel better.

Recently, two of Emma's friends were commiserating at school about a variety of troubles, just venting in the way that girls and teenagers sometimes do. Another girl piped up to say, "Well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm getting my braces off next week!" It didn't make them feel any better, other than to enjoy getting some mileage out of the ridiculousness of the statement. As my kids often like to say following non sequiturs, "That was random."

Emma and her friends were, of course, overjoyed the day the girl got her braces off, who wouldn't be? Today, Emma got her own braces off, leaving her with lovely teeth and a mouth free of metal and wires and bands. Going to the appointment, she kept her expectations low, in case it didn't happen, but it did, and I, for one, do feel better!

Tackling the Monster

2010-04-24T11:34:00.001-04:00

I found this in the trash, a study sheet of Chloe's, titled, "Marsalis on Music: Tackling the Monster." I think it's attributed to Wynton Marsalis. Chloe, who plays clarinet in band, listed the 12 tips on practicing.

I think they are really good tips on practicing life:

1. Seek private instruction.
2. Write out a schedule.
3. Set goals to chart your development.
4. Concentrate on practicing.
5. Relax and practice slowly.
6. Practice longer on things you can't play.
7. Play everything with maximum expression.
8. Don't be too hard on yourself.
9. Don't show off.
10. Think for yourself.
11. Be optimistic.
12. Look for connections to other things.

Joke for Friday

2010-04-23T06:03:00.003-04:00

This has been around for a while, but still has some wattage:

How are boys like lava lamps?

They're fun to look at, but not very bright.

Stop Motion Amazement

2010-04-22T21:06:00.002-04:00

The Year in Pictures, one of my favorite blog addictions, recently posted the following cool video. If you like the song, you can click through to Vimeo and to the free download (which I, of course, did). My favorite part is when the guy swims in the fish tank.

Enjoy!

The PEN Story from PENStory on Vimeo.

Cat Vows

2010-04-18T13:28:00.001-04:00

I recently found the following on a piece of paper in a book:

Do you, Miss Muffet, promise to love Milo throughout your life?
Do you, Milo, promise to love Miss Muffet throughout your life?
And always leave the taking care of when Milo is sick to his owners?
And always leave the taking care of when she is sick to her owners?
Yet always give comfort to your groom?
Yet always give comfort to your bride?
Do you, Miss Muffet, take Milo as your unlawfully wedded husband?
Do you, Milo, take Miss Muffet as your unlawfully wedded wife?
You may slip the necklace around Milo's neck.
You may slip the necklace around Miss Muffet's neck.
You may lick the bride!

These were wedding vows, written by the kids, for our cat Milo and the neighbor cat. The unlawful ceremony took place years ago and didn't go very well, Miss Muffet hissed throughout and Milo cowered. No one licked the bride.

Middle School, Part 3

2010-04-16T21:13:00.002-04:00

Chloe, who is in sixth grade, recently told me, "After lunch, sometimes they let us go outside by the dumpsters."

Woohoo! What a treat. When I laughed, she explained, "Well, it is outside and since it's by the dumpsters, none of the teachers come out. It gets kind of wild, especially lately, everyone's getting squirrelly."

Really, do tell.

"The boys are all pantsing each other [pulling each other's pants down, yes, that's exactly what pantsing is and just exactly what sixth grade boys enjoy doing: embarrassing someone horribly], and the other day one boy took off his belt and was swinging it over his head while singing 'Bedrock' [highly inappropriate lyrics, making the song super popular, of course]. Then his pants fell down."

I have blocked most of my memories of my middle school years, but I really think mine were considerably more tame. Chloe has even said, "I haven't been bored one day since school started."

At the Movies

2010-04-04T10:09:00.002-04:00

"How to Train Your Dragon" is cute, good for kids under 12-ish, with a good message about making love not war (more or less), with a little bit of Viking humor. I think what kept me from loving it was there wasn't enough humor thrown in. I am spoiled with the hidden layers of jokes in many kid movies today and "How to Train Your Dragon" seemed to be a train steered by someone very earnest, just not very humorous.

Still, better than reruns of "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody."

Spring Rain

2010-04-03T14:06:00.000-04:00

After a few gorgeous days of warmth and sunshine, today it poured. My mother said the old adage, "April showers bring May flowers."
Chase then asked, "What do May flowers bring?"
We didn't know.
"Pilgrims!"

Forwards and Backwards

2010-04-01T18:59:00.002-04:00

A very cool concept on a very hot topic (keep watching!):